What Is Your Purpose?

I was not raised with religion, but I was raised in a home of spirituality. While I do respect all religions and those who practice them, I just try and do the right thing and hope that everything will be okay. I wasn’t always successful in choosing the correct path in various matters. It has been easier the older I have become and adds a feeling of certainty that everything is as it should be.

Sometimes my spiritual path becomes intertwined with religion. I’m cool with that. My mind is always open, ready to discover new stuff, form my own opinions. Friday was a perfect example of such a thing. I was on my way home from work and took a small detour so I could check out some sprawling farmer’s fields that were turning green. (Those pictures came out fairly good.) After I completed that mission, I hopped in the car eager to participate in happy hour at my own home. Out of the corner of my eye, I caught a glimpse of a bell hanging from some kind of contraption. Behind it stood a large cross. There happened to be a very wide shoulder along the road, so I parked my car and walked over to check it out.

 

As I neared the bell it became apparent that something happened to it and it was now a memorial of some sort. Under the bell was a metal plaque. I read the body of the words and learned about the church where the bell once hung. The church was growing and doing well and then one day it was completely destroyed by fire. It was some amazing local history to learn that late in the week, especially since I have passed by the intersection of its location numerous times. How is it possible that I never noticed it? After I read the main message, my eyes passed over the words at the top: “Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will never pass away.” 

I read that and said out loud, “Wait? What?”

I read it again. 

“Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words never will pass away.”

As I read it a second time, I kind of had a weird moment, where time came to a complete halt and I totally felt like I was supposed to be there at that very moment, reading those words. I stood there for a few seconds and thought about it. I knew that there was a deeper religious message in those words. (The big clue was the “Matthew 24:35” part. I am smart enough to know that was a direct quote from the bible. But still…)

One of the reasons I enjoy writing is that I know my words will never die even though day after day I am slowly heading toward my own demise. I tell myself that at least people will know who I was and how I thought and felt about things. But I don’t really care about that. When I do pass, and I am not afraid to, I will be fine and so will everyone else who gets swallowed up by the universe in preparation for their next big adventure. I guess I’m still trying to figure out why it is that I write, and even what those words I read are supposed to mean to me.

It could just be a personal affirmation that it is my purpose. It’s what I really want to do. Last week I was drug tested at work. Even though I know I am clean (and for as long as I drive a commercial vehicle, I will always be), a part of me wished I had smoked a big joint over the weekend. I would have got fired. Then, I would have come and told my wife who would have gone into a massive panic. “WHAT? YOU GOT WHAT? HOW ARE WE…WHAT ARE WE?” Oh yes, she would have been flipping out. Me? Rather calmly, I would have told her, “We have enough money to survive about two weeks before they take our home, our cars followed by our children. I have got to get writing on that first book, and I have to do it very quickly.” I would have done just that, but it would have required an enormous amount of hope and faith that everything would be okay. Common sense dictates that smoking marijuana is not the best way to reach personal freedom. So I’m not going to do that.

I will, however, keep writing. I’ll write snipets on Facebook, stories on my blog and my Flickr photo page. I’ll write to myself, in my sleep and while awake. I’ll make constant notes on everyday life and how it makes me feel. I’ll read as much as I can on different subjects that interest me or arouse a certain feeling in my heart. As I go, I’ll enjoy a certain comfort knowing that the universe has me on the correct path. I don’t know if I would be the same man I am had I been raised with a strong bond to religion. My life didn’t happen that way. I can appreciate that I had a spiritual experience at a religious monument. I am thankful for that and the way my folks raised me. Keep your eyes open, find your special moments and best of luck with your true purpose, whatever it may be. We all have one. I’m slowly discovering mine and it feels good.