This Never Happens: The Story of Becoming the Object of Law Enforcement’s Affection
NASA has a program for airline crews that can be utilized to report safety issues with no repercussions with regards to the tattletale. A Captain with a major airline, for instance could file a report such as this:
“We were three hours out from JFK cruising at 37,000 feet when my Co-pilot informed me he wasn’t a pilot at all, but he did stay in a Holiday Inn Express last night.”
The Captain would be exempt from action by the airline (or the FAA) and the information in the report would be used to make improvements on how to avoid this kind of incident in the future. I am not aware of any similar program in existence for professional drivers. Maybe we need one...
With that said, I am going to begin my story with a disclaimer: What follows may or may not have really happened. It could quite possibly be a work of pure fiction. It does not involve a safety issue but rather a bone headed judgment call on my part, that is, if I am really capable of making such calls! I figure the disclaimer should keep the DOT (Department of Transportation) off my back and hopefully keep my safety office from giving me a ‘talking to’ if they ever caught wind of how my week began.
Sunday afternoon I arrived at the yard, with my usual five thousand bags and assorted items I think I’ll need for the week, but very rarely do. I’m really hoping to cut down so I can save money by not renting a U-Haul every time I go to work. After getting everything loaded and stowed away I began the paperwork process. As I went to get my logbook, I immediately knew I was in trouble.
The problem was, it wasn’t there. I took it home on Friday because it was very late and I planned to finish it up at home, which I was anxious to get back to. When I took it out of my bag, I placed it on top of the refrigerator where it would be safe from the hands of the most mischievous one and a half year old the world ever did see! Unfortunately, as the saying goes: out of sight, out of mind, and that’s where the darn thing stayed as I pulled out of the driveway with my rented twenty some foot U-Haul!
In case you are not a professional driver, here is the predicament I am facing: The regulations say I need to have the last seven days log sheets on my person shall a DOT officer request to see them. If I can not produce them when asked, I could be looking at a fine so steep I’ll be forced to only bring a few bags via my car and cut out the U-Haul routine altogether. That, of course, is if I still have a job once the people in Safety found out about my ticket as they don’t look kindly upon such offenses and would not be happy with what I did. To them I say, Lest not forget this could be a work of pure fiction!
As I sat there in my seat, using my special visionary powers to remotely view my logbook on top of the fridge, I had a decision to make. Spend an hour, make the round trip to go get it, or take a chance and hit the bricks to Connecticut (where I spend every Monday Lately) and hope and pray nothing happens. For the sake of the story, I chose not to go home, instead start a new logbook beginning with Saturday and go about my way. I figured If I had to produce a logbook, I’d explain my predicament to the friendly DOT officer and surely he would understand right?
No need to worry about being stopped and asked to show a logbook, because THAT NEVER HAPPENS! It’s very rare anyhow- I’ve only had to show mine a handful of times and that’s only because of stuff I have done that opened myself up to such an inspection. (That's a whole other story) Even then, I always passed the test with flying colors.
Sure, I go through weigh stations that are open all the time, but almost every time I (and my fellow Ashley drivers) are waved on through and there is a reason for that. The DOT has a rating for every trucking company out there that helps to determine if one truck should get more scrutiny then another truck. We happen to enjoy a rather high rating because we have a reputation of keeping our trucks and trailers in tip top shape, and our logbooks up to date and not at home on the fridge. With this in mind, I set sail for Connecticut with hopes I would be okay.
I went up there, performed five stops and made it back to Leesport with no problems. The End. Thanks for reading, come back again, ya’ll hear? Well, if what I wrote above is only a story, that would be the end, but what happened after that is all truth, nothing but the truth, so help me God!
When I got back to Leesport I learned my next adventure would be a jaunt down to Delaware for three stops. Since there was only two hours and change left on my clock, I made the decision to go home and see the family and more importantly get my logbook and bring it back into compliance on the hurry up.
Tuesday morning I was on the road by 7am en route to Delmar, Delaware for my first stop. I have a new route that's different then the way I used to go. It's a much easier and more enjoyable drive that one of our other drivers clued me in on. This would be my second time going this way, and I looked forward to the drive as it still had a lot of unseen sights for me to pick up on, some really cool older houses as well as some neat newer ones.
Passing through Avondale, PA on Route 41 South, I came upon a State Police SUV on the right shoulder just past an intersection with a traffic signal. He had his disco lights blazing and as I passed him I noticed he didn’t have anyone pulled over. I glanced in my passenger side mirror and noticed he shot out behind me and I drifted to the right so he could go by me. He drifted right behind my trailer and it was apparent he was after ME! I quickly pulled over and activated my hazard signals.
As this was all going down, someone on the CB asked “What did you do, furniture?” That was a little weird because no one ever calls me by my last name of “Furniture” but I am well used to being called Ashley. There is a pretty girl that works at the Pilot in Binghamton, NY named Ashley, and every time I am waiting for a shower invariably one of her co-workers will call out her name. Every single time I’ll look over like they are calling me. Happens every time I hear the name Ashley. Any wisecrack comments regarding what color lipstick I prefer to wear will not be published!
Back to the inquisitive truck driver who witnessed the Cop on my tail- I’m not sure if it was appropriate to answer him or not but I did anyway:
“I’m not sure what I did, I was having some impure thoughts but how he could have known that?”
The other trucker didn’t reply and later I began to wonder if the friendly policeman was monitoring the channel.
It was so long since I was pulled over in any vehicle that I was trying to remember what to do and began by unbuckling my seat belt so I could grab what I would need to. No need to turn on the interior lights as it is light out....keep my hands where he can see them.....My God, PUT THE SEAT BELT BACK ON- HE’LL THINK I NEVER HAD IT ON- INSTANT TICKET!
After what seemed like fifteen minutes the guy finally approached my door and began by asking if he could open my door.
“Yes sir.”
I was then asked for my drivers license, medical card, bill of lading, truck and trailer registration and insurance and of course MY LOGBOOK. He then informed me he was going to perform a driver inspection, also known as a level 3. Basically that entails making sure all the paperwork, including my logbook were in order and up to date. I could not believe this was happening especially after the chance I took only the day before! It was a cosmic slap in the face: I was now being corrected for my cocky “that never happens” attitude!
He retreated to his SUV and I sat there sweating it out like a kid taking the big final exam. It’s funny how things sometimes are not what they appear to be, and I figured that out by everyone giving me the hairy eyeball as they passed by the scene I found myself in. It looked liked I had been pulled over for speeding or running a light and neither was true. We all do it, glance at the perp pulled over and wonder what he or she did to attract the attention of the fuzz, but surely it couldn’t have been good. This kind of cracked me up and I began to smile and people probably began to wonder, why would someone possibly be smiling for being pulled over?
My smile faded when I glanced at the clock and noticed almost a half hour has passed since the officer took all my paperwork. Had I known it was going to take this long I would have went in the back and laid down for a bit, if only to read the paper or rest my eyes!
Finally after a little more then half hour he appeared again and handed back my paperwork. Before he could even speak I blurted out “How did I do?”
“You did great, everything looks in order.” He apologized for taking so much time and blamed it on the ancient electronic equipment he has to work with.
I cared less about the time versus the outcome and was happy to learn I was doing everything right and would soon be cut free. The Trooper was very professional and very friendly making the experience about as enjoyable as something like it can be. Before we parted ways he asked how my company was to work for.
“Oh, it’s horrible! The roof in the truck leaks and when it rains I wake up soaked! They tell me I’m fat and won’t let me use a hand truck to unload the furniture because of it. They even disconnected the heater because they said they don’t want me too comfortable!” Can you tell I’m smiling as I type and try to pass a complete fabrication as truth? I of course told him what I really thought of my employer, thanked him for his time, and went about my merry way.
The lesson I learned was ‘what never happens’ certainly can and sometimes will. I never got pulled over in a truck until that day and somehow managed to go two whole days till I did again!
On Friday I was driving South on Route 11, coming from Potsdam, NY en route to my last stop of the week in Watertown. I was cruising along in light traffic when I noticed the cars in front of me begin to pull over on the shoulder.
“That’s nice of them to let me get by” I thought I as I looked in my drivers side mirror and saw a New York State Police car trying to get around me with lights a blazing. I’m a fairly observant driver and a regular mirror scanner but this guy came out of nowhere!
I quickly pulled on the shoulder, behind the cars that had pulled over and again watched as a Policeman pulled in behind me. This is getting crazy, this happens all the time now!
This Officer was rather quick to approach me and went to open my door without asking, which was okay by me, I had nothing to hide and understood his need to make sure nothing potentially dangerous to him was hidden from his view. He was otherwise very polite and professional as he spoke:
“Hey buddy, you got a drivers license handy?”
“Sure do” I replied as I reached for my wallet.
“The Reason I pulled you over is I thought I saw you the phone back there.”
“Nope. I’ll be glad to show you my recent calls on the phone as proof.. You know, this a little weird I just got pulled over on Tuesday and was given a full inspection!”
I offered to show him the paperwork for that and he was interested in seeing it and told me there was no need to put me through that again. For some reason he seemed more relieved then I was about it. He asked if the guy in PA was a regular trooper or a DOT guy and I informed him he was a Regular Trooper working in the DOT division, or so it appeared. He told me they (meaning his superiors) want him to do more of this truck stuff and it kind of seemed I might have been one of his first big truck stops.
I then pointed at my phone and the headset that sits above it and mentioned how I use that when on the phone while driving.
“Yeah, I saw that when you opened the door. Maybe you just had your hand near your ear. Maybe you were touching your face in someway that made it look like you were on the phone...” He put his hand up near his hand as he explained this. As I watched this guy, it occurred to me that the officer that just pulled me over is now taking on the role of a good defense attorney! I liked this guy and wished I had met more officers of the law like him over the years, that would have come in real handy!
“Maybe” I said before he apologized for taking up my time and sent me on my way.
Only one week, but I managed to be pulled over twice. No big deal, that kind of stuff rarely happens!
“We were three hours out from JFK cruising at 37,000 feet when my Co-pilot informed me he wasn’t a pilot at all, but he did stay in a Holiday Inn Express last night.”
The Captain would be exempt from action by the airline (or the FAA) and the information in the report would be used to make improvements on how to avoid this kind of incident in the future. I am not aware of any similar program in existence for professional drivers. Maybe we need one...
With that said, I am going to begin my story with a disclaimer: What follows may or may not have really happened. It could quite possibly be a work of pure fiction. It does not involve a safety issue but rather a bone headed judgment call on my part, that is, if I am really capable of making such calls! I figure the disclaimer should keep the DOT (Department of Transportation) off my back and hopefully keep my safety office from giving me a ‘talking to’ if they ever caught wind of how my week began.
Sunday afternoon I arrived at the yard, with my usual five thousand bags and assorted items I think I’ll need for the week, but very rarely do. I’m really hoping to cut down so I can save money by not renting a U-Haul every time I go to work. After getting everything loaded and stowed away I began the paperwork process. As I went to get my logbook, I immediately knew I was in trouble.
The problem was, it wasn’t there. I took it home on Friday because it was very late and I planned to finish it up at home, which I was anxious to get back to. When I took it out of my bag, I placed it on top of the refrigerator where it would be safe from the hands of the most mischievous one and a half year old the world ever did see! Unfortunately, as the saying goes: out of sight, out of mind, and that’s where the darn thing stayed as I pulled out of the driveway with my rented twenty some foot U-Haul!
In case you are not a professional driver, here is the predicament I am facing: The regulations say I need to have the last seven days log sheets on my person shall a DOT officer request to see them. If I can not produce them when asked, I could be looking at a fine so steep I’ll be forced to only bring a few bags via my car and cut out the U-Haul routine altogether. That, of course, is if I still have a job once the people in Safety found out about my ticket as they don’t look kindly upon such offenses and would not be happy with what I did. To them I say, Lest not forget this could be a work of pure fiction!
As I sat there in my seat, using my special visionary powers to remotely view my logbook on top of the fridge, I had a decision to make. Spend an hour, make the round trip to go get it, or take a chance and hit the bricks to Connecticut (where I spend every Monday Lately) and hope and pray nothing happens. For the sake of the story, I chose not to go home, instead start a new logbook beginning with Saturday and go about my way. I figured If I had to produce a logbook, I’d explain my predicament to the friendly DOT officer and surely he would understand right?
No need to worry about being stopped and asked to show a logbook, because THAT NEVER HAPPENS! It’s very rare anyhow- I’ve only had to show mine a handful of times and that’s only because of stuff I have done that opened myself up to such an inspection. (That's a whole other story) Even then, I always passed the test with flying colors.
Sure, I go through weigh stations that are open all the time, but almost every time I (and my fellow Ashley drivers) are waved on through and there is a reason for that. The DOT has a rating for every trucking company out there that helps to determine if one truck should get more scrutiny then another truck. We happen to enjoy a rather high rating because we have a reputation of keeping our trucks and trailers in tip top shape, and our logbooks up to date and not at home on the fridge. With this in mind, I set sail for Connecticut with hopes I would be okay.
I went up there, performed five stops and made it back to Leesport with no problems. The End. Thanks for reading, come back again, ya’ll hear? Well, if what I wrote above is only a story, that would be the end, but what happened after that is all truth, nothing but the truth, so help me God!
When I got back to Leesport I learned my next adventure would be a jaunt down to Delaware for three stops. Since there was only two hours and change left on my clock, I made the decision to go home and see the family and more importantly get my logbook and bring it back into compliance on the hurry up.
Tuesday morning I was on the road by 7am en route to Delmar, Delaware for my first stop. I have a new route that's different then the way I used to go. It's a much easier and more enjoyable drive that one of our other drivers clued me in on. This would be my second time going this way, and I looked forward to the drive as it still had a lot of unseen sights for me to pick up on, some really cool older houses as well as some neat newer ones.
Passing through Avondale, PA on Route 41 South, I came upon a State Police SUV on the right shoulder just past an intersection with a traffic signal. He had his disco lights blazing and as I passed him I noticed he didn’t have anyone pulled over. I glanced in my passenger side mirror and noticed he shot out behind me and I drifted to the right so he could go by me. He drifted right behind my trailer and it was apparent he was after ME! I quickly pulled over and activated my hazard signals.
As this was all going down, someone on the CB asked “What did you do, furniture?” That was a little weird because no one ever calls me by my last name of “Furniture” but I am well used to being called Ashley. There is a pretty girl that works at the Pilot in Binghamton, NY named Ashley, and every time I am waiting for a shower invariably one of her co-workers will call out her name. Every single time I’ll look over like they are calling me. Happens every time I hear the name Ashley. Any wisecrack comments regarding what color lipstick I prefer to wear will not be published!
Back to the inquisitive truck driver who witnessed the Cop on my tail- I’m not sure if it was appropriate to answer him or not but I did anyway:
“I’m not sure what I did, I was having some impure thoughts but how he could have known that?”
The other trucker didn’t reply and later I began to wonder if the friendly policeman was monitoring the channel.
It was so long since I was pulled over in any vehicle that I was trying to remember what to do and began by unbuckling my seat belt so I could grab what I would need to. No need to turn on the interior lights as it is light out....keep my hands where he can see them.....My God, PUT THE SEAT BELT BACK ON- HE’LL THINK I NEVER HAD IT ON- INSTANT TICKET!
After what seemed like fifteen minutes the guy finally approached my door and began by asking if he could open my door.
“Yes sir.”
I was then asked for my drivers license, medical card, bill of lading, truck and trailer registration and insurance and of course MY LOGBOOK. He then informed me he was going to perform a driver inspection, also known as a level 3. Basically that entails making sure all the paperwork, including my logbook were in order and up to date. I could not believe this was happening especially after the chance I took only the day before! It was a cosmic slap in the face: I was now being corrected for my cocky “that never happens” attitude!
He retreated to his SUV and I sat there sweating it out like a kid taking the big final exam. It’s funny how things sometimes are not what they appear to be, and I figured that out by everyone giving me the hairy eyeball as they passed by the scene I found myself in. It looked liked I had been pulled over for speeding or running a light and neither was true. We all do it, glance at the perp pulled over and wonder what he or she did to attract the attention of the fuzz, but surely it couldn’t have been good. This kind of cracked me up and I began to smile and people probably began to wonder, why would someone possibly be smiling for being pulled over?
My smile faded when I glanced at the clock and noticed almost a half hour has passed since the officer took all my paperwork. Had I known it was going to take this long I would have went in the back and laid down for a bit, if only to read the paper or rest my eyes!
Finally after a little more then half hour he appeared again and handed back my paperwork. Before he could even speak I blurted out “How did I do?”
“You did great, everything looks in order.” He apologized for taking so much time and blamed it on the ancient electronic equipment he has to work with.
I cared less about the time versus the outcome and was happy to learn I was doing everything right and would soon be cut free. The Trooper was very professional and very friendly making the experience about as enjoyable as something like it can be. Before we parted ways he asked how my company was to work for.
“Oh, it’s horrible! The roof in the truck leaks and when it rains I wake up soaked! They tell me I’m fat and won’t let me use a hand truck to unload the furniture because of it. They even disconnected the heater because they said they don’t want me too comfortable!” Can you tell I’m smiling as I type and try to pass a complete fabrication as truth? I of course told him what I really thought of my employer, thanked him for his time, and went about my merry way.
The lesson I learned was ‘what never happens’ certainly can and sometimes will. I never got pulled over in a truck until that day and somehow managed to go two whole days till I did again!
On Friday I was driving South on Route 11, coming from Potsdam, NY en route to my last stop of the week in Watertown. I was cruising along in light traffic when I noticed the cars in front of me begin to pull over on the shoulder.
“That’s nice of them to let me get by” I thought I as I looked in my drivers side mirror and saw a New York State Police car trying to get around me with lights a blazing. I’m a fairly observant driver and a regular mirror scanner but this guy came out of nowhere!
I quickly pulled on the shoulder, behind the cars that had pulled over and again watched as a Policeman pulled in behind me. This is getting crazy, this happens all the time now!
This Officer was rather quick to approach me and went to open my door without asking, which was okay by me, I had nothing to hide and understood his need to make sure nothing potentially dangerous to him was hidden from his view. He was otherwise very polite and professional as he spoke:
“Hey buddy, you got a drivers license handy?”
“Sure do” I replied as I reached for my wallet.
“The Reason I pulled you over is I thought I saw you the phone back there.”
“Nope. I’ll be glad to show you my recent calls on the phone as proof.. You know, this a little weird I just got pulled over on Tuesday and was given a full inspection!”
I offered to show him the paperwork for that and he was interested in seeing it and told me there was no need to put me through that again. For some reason he seemed more relieved then I was about it. He asked if the guy in PA was a regular trooper or a DOT guy and I informed him he was a Regular Trooper working in the DOT division, or so it appeared. He told me they (meaning his superiors) want him to do more of this truck stuff and it kind of seemed I might have been one of his first big truck stops.
I then pointed at my phone and the headset that sits above it and mentioned how I use that when on the phone while driving.
“Yeah, I saw that when you opened the door. Maybe you just had your hand near your ear. Maybe you were touching your face in someway that made it look like you were on the phone...” He put his hand up near his hand as he explained this. As I watched this guy, it occurred to me that the officer that just pulled me over is now taking on the role of a good defense attorney! I liked this guy and wished I had met more officers of the law like him over the years, that would have come in real handy!
“Maybe” I said before he apologized for taking up my time and sent me on my way.
Only one week, but I managed to be pulled over twice. No big deal, that kind of stuff rarely happens!
Comments
I was "pulled over" once in Ohio. I had my cruise set at about 58 mph and was just bebopping along when I passed a trooper with a captured 4-wheeler. Since I wasn't quite going 60, I didn't bother slowing down... seeing as he was busy and all.
In about two miles I saw the blazing blue and red lights coming up behind me. I figured I'd been busted. So I signaled and slowed onto the shoulder. The cop pulls in front of me, instead of behind and quickly gets out of his car and comes back to my door.
He hopped up on the side as I rolled down the window and asked me why I stopped. I told him I thought he was after me since his lights were going and he was right on my tail.
He blushed a little at this after realizing he'd forgotten to turn his lights off after finishing up with his last customer. He apologized for the scare and told me to have a good day.
Some cops give other cops a good name, don't they?
Stace and I never get pulled in or talked to when the troopers are out working the weigh stations. I guess it's good to be fat old ladies who look like they wouldn't even know how to break the law if they wanted to. :)